http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RFpEA2Lsdw
John's friend, Mike, was at the house and they were eating wings when I got home from the mall. I left them talking, and walked around downtown Havana for a while. It was drizzling, cold, windy, and depressing. The Christmas music was slow and and unexpected downer. Not many people were shopping Havana. Everyone was at the malls.
John went to bed about 7:30 p.m., which meant he woke up around 2:30 and couldn't go back to sleep. He walked laps around the house until he wore himself out, then went back to bed. His morning was emotional. He was still tired, the incision had leaked yellow again, and he was weepy.
I never know what to expect with John because he is just like a kid when it comes to gifts. He gave me my Christmas present after we finished breakfast. It was an enlargement of a picture I took on our honeymoon to Cumberland Island in September!
A little backstory and explanation:
When we decided to get married, my friend, Kelly, gave us a set of little rubber duckies; a bride and groom. I sent them on a honeymoon to Kiev at spring break with my friend, Cheryl. They ride in my car; were at our wedding ceremony at Oven Park, went on our honeymoon to Cumberland Is. John made fun of me taking their pictures....with horses in the background; with the Dungeness ruins; with the marsh as a backdrop; on the rail of the dock where we caught the ferry to the island. This is the picture he chose. He wanted a gift that was perfect and personal to us, and saw the picture on his computer recently. Perfect. "You've had them with us all the time," he said. And it's a great picture. No one else would 'get it' but we do. Well, family and a few close friends know about the ducks.
We're putting the gauze pad over the tumor, and now using an ace bandage to wrap around John's head to keep the pad on. The sticky bandages don't work anymore, partly because the tumor is so big, and partly because a bigger pad is in his hair and pulls when you take it off. He feels more secure with the ace. Today the gauze had quite a bit of yellow drainage on it, and the incision had a nickle-sized dried yellow glob of drainage. John wants me to call the Hospice nurse tomorrow and let them know. Not that they need to visit, just let someone know. Not sure if it's brain fluid or infection.
The preacher's sermon this morning was on Jesus and how he gives life. Ironic on the surface, if you took it to mean just a fuller life on earth. And I remember what John is always telling me; I'm not really dying. I'll be alive forevermore with Christ, which is the life Jesus gives. Eternal life in him. I found my mind wandering to death certificates and how many copies I'll need.
Have a list of errands to run tomorrow so I can be home (!) the rest of the holiday/vacation.
perfect
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